The elephant doesn’t seem to be stalking me right away this morning. If you don’t understand what I mean by that please review my last post then return to this. Kind of rude wasn’t it, oh well I’m sure you’re not too overwhelmed by it and will read on. I wasn’t counting on my elephant-free zone to continue very long. It did come and go throughout the day but it did lose some weight.
I started scanning through other blogs last night after completing this one and everyone was so happy and brightly colored. No dark, sad, dank corners of the world were found. Maybe I haven’t looked in the right places yet, it seems the “next” button is turning me to the bright side of lives.
I didn’t have any dreams last night to write about; I was sad about that. It didn’t help that every time I blinked in bed last night an hour or two would go by. I don’t remember fall asleep at all and time just skipped itself. The feeling of wanting to stay home so I can focus on writing came around again, but then another dose of reality hit. How productive would I actually be if I was home all day? I always answer, “Not much” and that’s the end of that conversation.
So I’ve been easily sent into jealous spirals as of late. When I hear someone is doing well, of course I congratulate them, but deep down I wish I had what they had. Don’t get me wrong I’m not complaining about my life at all; it’s actually really great. I’m just selfish like all other human beings and those feelings have been easily relied. Of course one must remind themselves that they can’t have anything different if they don’t do anything different. This always sets me back in place to remember how awesome I am at doing nothing; therefore I will get nothing.